Its Great Being a Benefit Scrounger

I love knowing that the percentage of the population who have never had to claim benefits think my life is all sunshine and lollipops because I claim benefits.

The rhetoric from the wankers in government is that I live the life of luxury, sauntering my money away on endless holidays, fancy food and squirreling away £50 notes like a politician hides his expense forms.

The truth is much less glamorous and part of the reason for my daily IBS attacks, stress and ultimately depression.

Last week I had to pawn my wedding ring – obviously no big deal right? I mean it is not like I need it (which was one helpful comment passed to me)… The ring that was my last remaining attachment to Sheryl. I now have zero things to do with the wedding and our marriage. It broke my heart and was probably a major factor in my slump over the past few days.

Worse of all was that the money I got for the ring lasted about 15 minutes once I factored in gas and electric, which are paid for on key meters, and a few bits of shopping to last the weekend. Yet it will take me months to save up to buy the ring back. Six months is all I have to get it back, but the way things are right now it doesnt look good.

Today I managed to go shopping with my mum who had some Iceland vouchers that I could use, it was the first time in 6 weeks that I could stock up on food. The last time I went was also paid for by my mum.

No matter how I try I cannot keep up with the household bills, when Sheryl was here her money accounted for around 66.6% of the household income and although I have reduced a lot of the bills my outgoings are still more than my incoming, especially as I am still playing catch up from being sanctioned.

I dare not look at letters from my housing association in case I am behind on rent, I am reckless with money when I do have some, especially when I am manic.

I go out once a month even though I can’t really afford to because I am stuck indoors all the time and need the escape but I always end up spending more than I should.

I make sure the kids get things before me, rightly so as a parent but there are things that I can’t really do without because of health conditions that I just simply cannot afford which is making the existing problems worse. For example many years ago as a kid when playing football I fucked my knees, this means I have to wear decent trainers to protect them. Air max are the only ones that I can wear for long periods of time without being crippled at the end of the day, but the cheapest pair equate to a weeks benefit for me so I am wearing footwear that basically kills me when I wear them.

As the winter kicks in, and naturally the energy company ups the prices, I have seen a 3 fold increase in the amount of gas I use a week, to the point where nearly 40% of my ESA goes in gas and electric. Yet I can only afford to put the heating on for an hour a day if I am lucky, this flat is freezing in the winter so even wearing an extra layer does nothing. Some days your hands are numb from the cold in here.

I am on average two months behind on ALL bills, and while the easy option would be to say “get rid of broadband” imagine how isolated I would be if I didn’t have internet access, all my friends are online and it is not like they come over and see me.

I have sold anything worth selling on Ebay, I have very little of value…

Worse of all is that I cannot give any money to Sheryl for Lilybets upkeep. 

So when you hear the media and the government talking about how much easier life is for the benefit scroungers have a serious think about it, the numbers they give you are there for their own agendas.

As much as I would love to be out working, the sad fact is that currently I am unable to do so because of my health. I can barely do anything right now because of my health…

Advertisements

Which Direction Next?

Image Credit: Google

So here I stand at a crossroads in my life.

Which direction do I take next?

This is where I need help because I have NO IDEA what to do anymore.

What am I these days? am I still considering myself a writer? I am trying to write a new book but in all honesty I feel like I am wasting my time with a new book if the others are not selling.

I wish I was not so into the stats side of things like this blog and book sales, then I could happily plod away without worrying why people are not reading this blog, or commenting and why books are not selling.

Are the books too expensive? £5.20 is the current price for the paperbacks but out of that I only make £1.20 or so per book so dropping the prices wont help me personally but is it better if they were reduced?

Is it just that people are not really that interested in books on depression, most likely this is the case but as the stats show 1 in 4 people will suffer surely there is a market. Perhaps I am just not very good at marketing and should be bugging more people to spread the word.

I am sick and tired of the constant financial struggles in my life that I feel are holding back my mental well-being.  It is hard to focus on getting back to “normal” when all you can think about is “can I eat today because the freezer is getting empty and the kids need to eat first”

The sad reality is that it is going to get a lot worse come April when the universal credits system comes into effect in the UK – as it stands already we are going to be at least £100 a month worse off and that is not taking into account the guaranteed rent increase that will happen next year (also in April) so in all likely hood it is likely to be £200 a month worse off!

We are struggling to survive now as it is so how the hell are we going to cope with the new changes? not the government care as they sit in their homes fiddling expense claims and doing bugger all but make our lives worse while lining their own pockets! That applies to MPs in all parties not just the current government.

Naturally it is changing to benefit everyone, bullshit it is! because a minority of people cheat the system they are forcing everyone back into work, regardless of health issues. As the lady at the job centre told me “the plan is to get everyone off benefits!”

Here is the problem though I struggle with mornings! Everyday I cannot function until I have visited the little boys room at least 4 times! On my good days this is not such a big deal but those days are few and far between. So imagine me starting a new job and spending the best part of the day sitting on the toilet, gonna go down well with new employers isn’t it! That is assuming I can actually manage to get a decent nights sleep before hand to wake up on time before even worrying about public transport as I no longer have a car. Lets also not forget that I will need to have money to pay for the travel expenses to get to and from work for the month in advance you have to work.

Then there is the stress of updating your housing benefit application which basically works like this:

Inform the council you are now in employment

They immediately stop your claim and request 3 months worth of pay slips

you ring them and explain that you have been in the job 5 minutes and therefore have not worked 3 months to give them the pay slips they require

you end up falling behind on the rent

you ring the council again and they do nothing to help – assuming of course than you can get them to answer the bloody phone

or even better they expect you to head down to the offices but you can’t because your working and cannot get any time off

your landlord then tells you that your behind on rent and start sending eviction warnings

said eviction warnings start to make you ill and you end up having time off work because of the stress

you lose job and start back at square one again meanwhile the council refuse to backdate your claim and landlord still on your back

you wait weeks for benefits to start again !

how do I know this? because it has happened to me every time I have gone back to work from being unemployed! EVERY SINGLE TIME!!

Universal credits will hit everybody who claims benefits for more information check here the benefit payments will no longer be weekly all benefits will be grouped together and paid monthly. I struggle with fortnightly payments so monthly  will be a nightmare to deal with!

The reality is unless I go back to work I am going to be living in poverty but then I need to be ready to cope with working and at the moment I am nowhere near ready!

Thats why I need to learn to promote my books better to start earning some money from them, or the shop full of awesome moose items or get myself out there to try and raise some money so for once I don’t have to stress about finances and focus on getting back to Garry!

On the plus side it is awesome having the self service checkouts at the tesco express store down the road from me as I pay using my embarrassing collection of copper and silver coins rather than having the person on the till look down their nose at me for pulling out 5p 10p and 20p coins LOL

Image in everything for the moose dontcha know!

I am the poorest materialistic person in the world!

Quiet Moose

You may have noticed the silence from me over the past few days, if you haven’t why not 😀

Truth be told I am having a difficult time dealing with financial issues resulting from my stupid gambling problems. When I went mental a few weeks ago I basically wiped out Sheryl’s overdraft and since then we start every week with a balance of minus £200 and benefits are getting swallowed up trying to play catch up.

As we speak today I got my benefits yesterday and have a grand total of £50 available for the next 2 weeks once all bills were covered (and by all I mean the essentials), food shopping is not an option so we are working our way through whats left in the freezer as the fridge is empty and the cupboards almost bare.

I can cope with most aspects of mental health but the stresses of poverty are dragging me under as usual especially as we approach the dreaded C word period.

I am asking for help in publicising my books to at least try and help me earn a few quid pocket money.

Sometimes I think the only thing keeping me alive is the fact that cremations cost so much money!

I am working hard emotionally to keep a brave face on things and I appreciate all the people who have gone above and beyond trying to support me, one person actually donated some money to me yesterday an unbelievable act that had me in tears at the gesture.

For once I would love to be able to not worry about money and the stresses lack of it brings, after all I am on benefits and we are meant to live the life of a king according to the media! The truth is much different though, sure my rent is paid and for that I am grateful as I have the security of a roof over my head but what about other things in life, should I really have to contemplate disconnecting the internet and my only real lifeline in terms of the outside world? yes its getting that bad!

Without internet access obviously that means no blog and this is such a passion of mine let alone the social interactions I have via Facebook and Twitter.

I am sick of reading about how easy life is for people on benefits would love to see Mps living on what money we receive especially as it is paid fortnightly so your living on fresh air for the week before and the week after you get money because bills and shopping takes it all away soon as you get it. In fact I haven’t done a proper food shop for weeks now but it’s Okay because I am on benefits and therefor extremely well off! IF ONLY

Of course it is easy for people to tell me to find a job but in case your not aware I am too ill to work!

Looking at things to sell to make money and only thing I have of value is my body! any offers?