Talking or Listening?

What helps people with mental health issues more?

someone talking about their issues or having someone to listen while YOU open up?

I have not written much recently because I have really tried hard to be there for other people lately. Whilst my issues are still there I get so much out of helping others. People contact me via this blog or via twitter or sometimes I reach out to them myself. I know how much a simple message from someone can help bring even a tiny bit of comfort or hope.

Naturally it is down to my misguided belief that I can help people after all I am pretty messed up myself but recently I can feel my old self returning. I really should think about looking into courses for counselling or something because it is becoming a real area of interest for me but I am just not clever, patient and able to deal with anything educational. Now don’t get me wrong I am intelligent in my own way but as I have mentioned before I have always been more street smart than academic.

I have to admit it is so nice that someone feels like they can open up to you because you have been through a similar experience, or simply because they know you will not judge them, talk down to them or even because you will just allow them to vent in your inbox!

Some days I don’t want to talk about myself and my battle and on days like this I much prefer listening to others and hopefully helping them.

I guess I am just lucky that other people’s problems do not trigger me in anyway. If anyone ever feels alone and needs someone to talk to please don’t be afraid to message me. You can contact me here

What would be nice though is if I could use the advice I give to others for myself but is that not always the case!

What do you prefer? talking or listening?

21 comments on “Talking or Listening?

  1. I think I prefer listening. Although when I go to make comments on the things that I read, I always feel like I talk about myself too much in my response…I make it “all about me.” Something I’ve been accused of all of my life, so I am paranoid about it. I just like to tell a similar story so that I can relate to that other person…so, sometimes, I hold back on my comments because I feel too self-centered. GRRRRR! I dunno.

    =( lol


    • ha ha i know exactly what you mean by this! I do the same as well so sometimes I prefer listening instead of talking like you. Besides for me at least if I am helping someone else I am not focusing on my own issues 😀


  2. For me, it depends on my mood. When I’m ill, manic or depressive, I jibber jabber on and on. When I’m more balanced, I could sit and listen for hours. I do feel ashamed when I realise I haven’t been listening properly to someone else’s problems. Can do better on twitter, with encouraging soundbites, when I am ill.


  3. I’m like bouncietigger. When I am feeling low, I soooo want someone to reach out and ask me what’s wrong and listen to me vent. But when I’m feeling better, I can be a very good listener. What is really hard about listening, is when I don’t have a solution for someone’s problem. I need to learn that it’s okay to just let someone cry/vent without feeling bad if I can’t fix their troubles. That is really, really hard for me. I hate to see friends suffer.


  4. Hi, i’m really pleased that you’re seeing your positive attributes. I do think you have a lot to offer, I do think you listen a lot, and have an ability to remain calm and unbiased sometimes when I just cannot possibly do so! Ahem, anyway, nice post. Basically right now I still have my finger in the air! Haha


  5. Pingback: Talking or Listening? | Mental Health, Politics and LGBT issues |

  6. Your Moosey picture lights up my posts – I thank you for every little comment you send my way. I hope you know I will always listen to you xx


  7. It depends, sometimes I like listening to people, and listening to people can in turn help me because it makes me realise I’m not the only one. Sometimes it’s nice if someone will listen to me. It’s frustrating when they won’t because, for me at least, it’s usually because they aren’t willing to accept that there’s a problem to need listening to.
    I think a counselling course would be a great thing for you to do. A colleague of mine who just started working as a counsellor part time. And if you don’t like academic stuff it sounds as though her course was mostly practical exercises and role plays. I think she did that over weekends at one of the local universities. But I would have thought there’d be similar courses all over the place.


  8. I prefer listening, mostly because the social anxiety makes it extremely difficult for me to talk.

    The best situation for me is someone to talk to me about what they are going through/went through and then tell me what they think I’m thinking, which somehow makes me slightly more comfortable talking.


  9. For me I think both are important. It’s good to talk because it lets it out, and it’s good to listen because 1, it helps other people and 2, it helps you know you aren’t alone 🙂 You’re doing such a great thing here Moose! Maybe you could find out about the possibility of counselling or something similar?


  10. I also prefer to listen as it comes more naturally to me. If I was less repressed and reserved in my nature then, maybe I’d be able to open up even more and I’d enjoy that kind of experience more.

    There’s always something good about helping others – Lisa’s blogged about that very thing on her blog (Forcing Myself Happy). You also make a real connection. If you’re bold enough, you can talk to anyone. In my opinion, you don’t have to develop the same kind of ‘bond’ with a counsellor or therapist but, when someone else opens up to you, a new connection is made. 🙂


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